*Sniffle sniffle.* Well, ladies and gentlemen, the time has come for me, to leave my home away from home, in Goldendale to return to my home in Portland. It has been a good 2 weeks, all the NBATV, all the mini basketball in the hallway, all the basketball games (that i kicked ass at) and all the food. I will miss it. I won't return to this small town for another 3 weeks. Yes, I have camps for 3 weeks straight. That means that I will not be able to make fun of this town for 3 weeks! I will have to make up for it, somehow. I got it! I can make fun of Portland. Yes, thats what I'll do. *Pat on the back.*
But, i miss my baby brother so much, it will be good to see him again. I don't want to leave. I like it up here, aside from the really bad service, the obnoxious wind, the bad hoops, the bad typewriters, the sky thats way to light, the channel flipping whenever a Tampax commercial comes on. Other than that I will miss this town so much.
Why do I have to leave. WAAAH!
Showing posts with label grandma. Show all posts
Showing posts with label grandma. Show all posts
7.16.2010
7.13.2010
Oh "Brother,"
We= Me and my grandmother.Do you know what that is, right above this sentence? Of course you don't otherwise you would be blogging about it too. It is a piece of crap, is what it is. It is a useless piece of plastic that draws people in a than spits them out later. This might be worthy to add to the rip off list. Heck, we would put this at number 1 on the all time rip off list. I am going to sue Office World and Brother Typewriters, for giving me a defective typewriter. You hear that, Brother, you've been warned.
Yesterday, we ordered some ribbon to put in it so we could actually see the text. We were so happy when it arived nearly 24 hours later, on the front door step of grandma's house. We danced around and sang and of course praised the lord. We. then, got it out of the box that it was being contained in and went over to the you-know-what, and tried to see if we could take the other one out. First we took the ribbon the printed white, out of it and than we tried to take the cartridge out. We popped it out only to find that it was actually part of the machine and that we were supposed to put the other ribbon on top of it, not where it was. After realizing this, we sat there, wishing we hadn't done that.
We dedicated the next 30 minutes to trying to hook the thing back on the... other thing. We tried different things, including the old push'n'pull and using a knife, a fork, a toothpick, another knife, and last another knife. No luck, until I heard a snap from the you-know-what and grandma said "I got it." There's nothing like using your hands.
I got the black ink ribbon and snapped it into place, just above the other thing that I don't know the name of. It was all in place. We had the letters the ribbon, the snapper thing that makes the letters and, most importantly, the paper. I looked at my grandmother, and she looked back at me. We shared to quick prayer and than I sat down and typed one letter. F. And than I typed another letter. U. I pressed the space bar enough times so we could see the spot on the paper where I wrote those to letters. Nothing.
At that moment I turned into a bull and started charging at that typewriter, like a red sheet, all the while swearing my ass off... in my head, but all that came out of my mouth was "gosh." I fiddled with it for about 30 more minutes, but grandma had already given up. She went into the kitchen and started to make some Peanut Butter cookies. (Do you like nuts?) After 30 minutes passed by I indignantly walked into my room, sat on my sore ass and tuned the tv to channel 402 to watch some NBATV.
7.12.2010
The Reunion (First attempted to be written by typewriter.)
Yes, at first I wanted to type this on my new typewriter, but than I came across the fact that it was just a piece of shit and would not cooperate with me if I bribed it. Yes, I got a new typewriter, not that I ever had one. Grandma got it for me a couple weeks ago and apparently "forgot," to tell me about it, because I seemed just "fine," with typing on the computer. Well, I have news for you, sister, I want to type on a typewriter. Typewriter; the longest word you can type on the very first row of your keyboard. It was a typewriter that was supposed to be able to erase your mistakes, but than I found out that instead of ink, there was whiteout. It almost inspired me to see if I could make a better rip off, though that is highly unlikely. So we went online and ordered some ink, to put in it so I can see what i am typing. I will start to write blogs on it, and maybe even some stories that you won't be able to read. Maybe me and my father could do a father, son novelist think like Anne and Christopher Rice. SPINE SHIVERING! SPINE SHIVERING!
Anyway, to the point, this last weekend was the family reunion for 3 different families in one back-yard. Yes you heard me right, they were going to merge 3 completely different family reunions. It's like a... 3 for 1 deal. Anyway, so we were there with 2 other family's that we didn't know. But the food made up for it. When I went to get food I saw some stuffing on the table, I got some and realized something horrible, under the stuffing there was a huge layer of crappy mashed potato's. Another rip off. But other than that, and the 8 salads on the table (Record: 9 at a wedding at the G-dale church) the food was wonderful. I ate my worries away. One of those worries was if I would ever recover from all the food i was eating. it all goes straight to my thighs. When I wake up tomorrow I am going to find camera's from "the biggest loser," surrounding my bed.
This weekend also made me feel like such a city boy. I found out that my grandpa grew up the Eddyville area. And all the tree's and stuff. All the people talking about how much they loathe Portland. There probably mixing us up with Cleveland.
The weird thing about the Reunion was that there was a history of it. it was always on the 2nd Sunday of each july and there was a treasury. Yep, thats right. There was a treasury... for a family reunion. That brought giggles to my face. Tee-hee.
Another funny thing is that when I went to sleep on Saturday night, at GG and Gramps' house, the bed was lined with plastic. okay sure I used to have a bed-wetting problem, but those days are behind me, and you don't need to make me feel bad. Gosh. Kidding I am kidding please don't take that seriously. All in all it was a big LOL. Oh my God, best rhyme ever.
Anyway, to the point, this last weekend was the family reunion for 3 different families in one back-yard. Yes you heard me right, they were going to merge 3 completely different family reunions. It's like a... 3 for 1 deal. Anyway, so we were there with 2 other family's that we didn't know. But the food made up for it. When I went to get food I saw some stuffing on the table, I got some and realized something horrible, under the stuffing there was a huge layer of crappy mashed potato's. Another rip off. But other than that, and the 8 salads on the table (Record: 9 at a wedding at the G-dale church) the food was wonderful. I ate my worries away. One of those worries was if I would ever recover from all the food i was eating. it all goes straight to my thighs. When I wake up tomorrow I am going to find camera's from "the biggest loser," surrounding my bed.
This weekend also made me feel like such a city boy. I found out that my grandpa grew up the Eddyville area. And all the tree's and stuff. All the people talking about how much they loathe Portland. There probably mixing us up with Cleveland.
The weird thing about the Reunion was that there was a history of it. it was always on the 2nd Sunday of each july and there was a treasury. Yep, thats right. There was a treasury... for a family reunion. That brought giggles to my face. Tee-hee.
Another funny thing is that when I went to sleep on Saturday night, at GG and Gramps' house, the bed was lined with plastic. okay sure I used to have a bed-wetting problem, but those days are behind me, and you don't need to make me feel bad. Gosh. Kidding I am kidding please don't take that seriously. All in all it was a big LOL. Oh my God, best rhyme ever.
7.08.2010
A History of Goldendale,
Ladies and gentlemen, you always hear me ripping on how crappy Goldendale is and how small it is, but that is just because it is really fun to make fun of, but, I don't think that it would be, even a little bit fair, if I made fun of this small town without knowing any history about it. Today, when i woke up I had to goals in my head for what i wanted to to today. 1.) Watch where leBron decided to go (Miami Heat) and 2.) study up on the rotten, small, awesome town that I have called my home for the last 3 days. Well bucckle your seat belts and hold on to your Miami Heat caps, were going back to school.
[History teacher, Professor Hacker, stands in front of the bored classroom, and gets ready to lecture about his grandparents home town, Goldendale.] "I stand before you today, to give you knowledge of the outside world, and educate you, so you can look smart, in front of your grandparents at your family reunion. Lets get started.
In 1872 the town, of course we are talking about Goldendale, was given its name by the early homesteader John Golden. The Golden House is still viewable at Columbus and Collins St. in downtown Goldendale. In 1878 Goldendale became the county seat. Other early towns in the county were White Salmon, Lyle, Bingen, Glenwood, Dallesport and Bickleton, all still in existence, and all still have kept there really shitty names. Goldendale was officially incorporated on November 14, 1879.
Goldendale has remained the employment, business, commercial and banking center for the valley and, as the county seat, is the location for Klickitat County's courts and government offices. In recent years this small community has suffered from severe economic decline. After a local aluminum plant that once employed many residents closed, the small community struggled economically. The loss of tax base has taken its toll on the funds available for maintaining the city's infrastructure. In recent years there has been an interest in installing wind turbines that would generate power. While it has provided some jobs, this industry has not been the economic solution for which many residents hoped, and it is true that all 8 people that preside in this town all work there
In 2009, Goldendale was the site of the capture of an escaped insane killer, Philip Paul. That was the most exciting thing that happened there since the funeral where all the crazy people from Tennessee came and protested.
As of the census of 2000, there were 3,760 people, in the town, 1,515 households, and 963 families residing in the city. The population density was 1,592.6 people per square mile (615.1/km²). There were 1,690 housing units at an average density of 715.8/sq mi (276.5/km²). This next stat is really funny and it also shows you how much Goldendale hates black people. opp's was that my outside voice. The racial makeup of the city was 87.42% White, 0.21% African American, 4.63% Native American, 0.72% Asian, 0.27% Pacific Islander, 4.07% from other races, and 2.69% from two or more races. Hispanic or Latino of any race were 5.85% of the population.
There were 1,515 households out of which 34.4% had children under the age of 18 living with them, 46.4% were married couples living together, 12.7% had a female householder with no husband present, and 36.4% were non-families. 31.3% of all households were made up of individuals and 14.1% had someone living alone who was 65 years of age or older. The average household size was 2.41 and the average family size was 3.02.
This next stat shows you how old this town is. I bet you all of the 65+ people go to Community Grace Brethren Church. In the city the population was spread out with 28.4% under the age of 18, 7.7% from 18 to 24, 26.1% from 25 to 44, 22.6% from 45 to 64, and 15.2% who were 65 years of age or older. The median age was 36 years. For every 100 females there were 90.6 males. For every 100 females age 18 and over, there were 89.4 males.
The median income for a household in the city was $26,030, and the median income for a family was $33,866. Males had a median income of $36,977 versus $22,289 for females. The per capita income for the city was $13,111. About 21.9% of families and 25.4% of the population were below the poverty line, including 30.5% of those under age 18 and 26.3% of those age 65 or over.
Goldendale is located within the arid area in eastern Washington known as a rain shadow, caused by the Cascade Mountains 40 miles to the west. Yearly rainfall averages 8 to 12 inches. This produces a landscape of open bunch-grass prairies dotted with sagebrush and rabbit brush containing the occasional juniper tree, while the more sheltered areas consist of ponderosa pine and oak savannahs. Overcast days are rare, occurring mostly in late fall and throughout winter. Summer temperatures can range well over 100 degrees, while winter, when most of the precipitation occurs, can see temperatures below zero, particularly in January. Summer thunderstorms occur intermittently, particularly in July and August, but due to high cloud bases, rain seldom reaches the ground in any appreciable amount. Lightning-caused range and forest fires are a common occurrence during this time of year, however. Spring flowers and green meadows and prairies make Goldendale a particularly beautiful site. Spring and summer can be very blustery since the Chinook winds off the Pacific Ocean are funneled through the Columbia Gorge. Fall tends to be almost windless, and the autuminal oak leaves add a lovely touch of golden rust red to Observatory Hill on the north side of town.
[Professor Hacker looks around the room, as if to look into the students minds, and than slowly walks off the stage.] This would be an appropriate time to clap. Don't worry, your roomate won't think your crazy for all that long, maybe for the rest of the day at most.
[History teacher, Professor Hacker, stands in front of the bored classroom, and gets ready to lecture about his grandparents home town, Goldendale.] "I stand before you today, to give you knowledge of the outside world, and educate you, so you can look smart, in front of your grandparents at your family reunion. Lets get started.
In 1872 the town, of course we are talking about Goldendale, was given its name by the early homesteader John Golden. The Golden House is still viewable at Columbus and Collins St. in downtown Goldendale. In 1878 Goldendale became the county seat. Other early towns in the county were White Salmon, Lyle, Bingen, Glenwood, Dallesport and Bickleton, all still in existence, and all still have kept there really shitty names. Goldendale was officially incorporated on November 14, 1879.
Goldendale has remained the employment, business, commercial and banking center for the valley and, as the county seat, is the location for Klickitat County's courts and government offices. In recent years this small community has suffered from severe economic decline. After a local aluminum plant that once employed many residents closed, the small community struggled economically. The loss of tax base has taken its toll on the funds available for maintaining the city's infrastructure. In recent years there has been an interest in installing wind turbines that would generate power. While it has provided some jobs, this industry has not been the economic solution for which many residents hoped, and it is true that all 8 people that preside in this town all work there
In 2009, Goldendale was the site of the capture of an escaped insane killer, Philip Paul. That was the most exciting thing that happened there since the funeral where all the crazy people from Tennessee came and protested.
As of the census of 2000, there were 3,760 people, in the town, 1,515 households, and 963 families residing in the city. The population density was 1,592.6 people per square mile (615.1/km²). There were 1,690 housing units at an average density of 715.8/sq mi (276.5/km²). This next stat is really funny and it also shows you how much Goldendale hates black people. opp's was that my outside voice. The racial makeup of the city was 87.42% White, 0.21% African American, 4.63% Native American, 0.72% Asian, 0.27% Pacific Islander, 4.07% from other races, and 2.69% from two or more races. Hispanic or Latino of any race were 5.85% of the population.
There were 1,515 households out of which 34.4% had children under the age of 18 living with them, 46.4% were married couples living together, 12.7% had a female householder with no husband present, and 36.4% were non-families. 31.3% of all households were made up of individuals and 14.1% had someone living alone who was 65 years of age or older. The average household size was 2.41 and the average family size was 3.02.
This next stat shows you how old this town is. I bet you all of the 65+ people go to Community Grace Brethren Church. In the city the population was spread out with 28.4% under the age of 18, 7.7% from 18 to 24, 26.1% from 25 to 44, 22.6% from 45 to 64, and 15.2% who were 65 years of age or older. The median age was 36 years. For every 100 females there were 90.6 males. For every 100 females age 18 and over, there were 89.4 males.
The median income for a household in the city was $26,030, and the median income for a family was $33,866. Males had a median income of $36,977 versus $22,289 for females. The per capita income for the city was $13,111. About 21.9% of families and 25.4% of the population were below the poverty line, including 30.5% of those under age 18 and 26.3% of those age 65 or over.
Goldendale is located within the arid area in eastern Washington known as a rain shadow, caused by the Cascade Mountains 40 miles to the west. Yearly rainfall averages 8 to 12 inches. This produces a landscape of open bunch-grass prairies dotted with sagebrush and rabbit brush containing the occasional juniper tree, while the more sheltered areas consist of ponderosa pine and oak savannahs. Overcast days are rare, occurring mostly in late fall and throughout winter. Summer temperatures can range well over 100 degrees, while winter, when most of the precipitation occurs, can see temperatures below zero, particularly in January. Summer thunderstorms occur intermittently, particularly in July and August, but due to high cloud bases, rain seldom reaches the ground in any appreciable amount. Lightning-caused range and forest fires are a common occurrence during this time of year, however. Spring flowers and green meadows and prairies make Goldendale a particularly beautiful site. Spring and summer can be very blustery since the Chinook winds off the Pacific Ocean are funneled through the Columbia Gorge. Fall tends to be almost windless, and the autuminal oak leaves add a lovely touch of golden rust red to Observatory Hill on the north side of town.
[Professor Hacker looks around the room, as if to look into the students minds, and than slowly walks off the stage.] This would be an appropriate time to clap. Don't worry, your roomate won't think your crazy for all that long, maybe for the rest of the day at most.
7.06.2010
The Turkeyradio Times: July 6th 2010: "Local adolescent drives to grandma's house in far away 'christian' town,"
Column 1: Boy drives to town populated by christians.
Today, ladies and gentlemen, the unthinkable happened. A boy, age 12, left his home in Portland to go all the way up to Goldendale. The boy was not kidnapped or raiped, he just left Portland. Good thing "Turkeyradio Times," is here to bring it to you first.
Thanks, Mark. It all happened, about 3 weeks ago, when this young boy's mom decided to send him to his grandma's house for 2 week's before, returning to home and going to his Larry Steele basketball camp. Eli, the 12 year old boy, made lot's of sarcastic remarks about his grandma's house between then, and now, but inside he really felt like he wanted to go to his grandma's house. Sources indicate, that he was happy when he got there, so happy, in fact that he started to dance around his room, nerf basketball in hand.
Before he left to go to Goldendale, he and his mother and grandmother, stopped by the local plant shop to get some plants for there garden's. Eli, as you can imagine was not thrilled about it, but he stuck along for the ride, knowing that there was a "Whopper," in it for him afterwards. Sources indicate that, not only did he eat a Whopper, but he also ate a side of fries and start chicken nuggets that are supposed to look like crowns and some sprite. Mark?
Well, Staci, this boy must have been hungry because that's a lot of food for a 12 year old to consume at one time, not that I blame him. All that he had had that day was hashbrowns and egg's 3 hours earlier. The poor kid must have been starving. Back to you, Staci.
Thank you, mark. I am being told that on the way down to Goldendale, Eli and his grandmother listened to a cheesy Mary Higgins Clark audiobook. Well, thats all we have for now. See you next time on The Turkeyradio Times.
Column 2: Advice column.
Today's word of advice is this. Being pre-approved for a credit card does not mean you have to apply for it.
Thank you,
Today, ladies and gentlemen, the unthinkable happened. A boy, age 12, left his home in Portland to go all the way up to Goldendale. The boy was not kidnapped or raiped, he just left Portland. Good thing "Turkeyradio Times," is here to bring it to you first.
Thanks, Mark. It all happened, about 3 weeks ago, when this young boy's mom decided to send him to his grandma's house for 2 week's before, returning to home and going to his Larry Steele basketball camp. Eli, the 12 year old boy, made lot's of sarcastic remarks about his grandma's house between then, and now, but inside he really felt like he wanted to go to his grandma's house. Sources indicate, that he was happy when he got there, so happy, in fact that he started to dance around his room, nerf basketball in hand.
Before he left to go to Goldendale, he and his mother and grandmother, stopped by the local plant shop to get some plants for there garden's. Eli, as you can imagine was not thrilled about it, but he stuck along for the ride, knowing that there was a "Whopper," in it for him afterwards. Sources indicate that, not only did he eat a Whopper, but he also ate a side of fries and start chicken nuggets that are supposed to look like crowns and some sprite. Mark?
Well, Staci, this boy must have been hungry because that's a lot of food for a 12 year old to consume at one time, not that I blame him. All that he had had that day was hashbrowns and egg's 3 hours earlier. The poor kid must have been starving. Back to you, Staci.
Thank you, mark. I am being told that on the way down to Goldendale, Eli and his grandmother listened to a cheesy Mary Higgins Clark audiobook. Well, thats all we have for now. See you next time on The Turkeyradio Times.
Column 2: Advice column.
Today's word of advice is this. Being pre-approved for a credit card does not mean you have to apply for it.
Thank you,
6.24.2010
Looking forward to the day ahead of me...
First off I want to start by apologizing about that video on my last blog, I had no idea that Fifa was such a bitch. Listen Fifs, if it's okay to play that video on Youtube it should be more than f***ing okay to play it on my blog! From this moment forward I am boycotting Fifa. Yeah thats right, Fifa you heard me, now NBATV is my new best friend... ha!
Anyway, before all that I wanted to talk about today. Today is the day of the 59th NBA draft and I am so excited. Portland has the 22nd pick 9not good at all) and I am hoping that they get that 6'11 Whiteside guy. I checked last night and it turns out that he is the 22nd most talented player in the draft, today. But we will see.
Also today i want to work on the story I am writing about a boy (based on me) who wants to run away. But don't worry I don't want to run away. Here is a sample.
It seemed highly improbable that a kid like me would ever come across the thought of running away, especially when his life was doing better. Maybe it was the sense of impending doom, in that my report card would be arriving in my Portland home soon. Maybe it was the sense that my life had struck the point where it was routine.
You hear some adults talking about how much they would give to have a routine life. My father, for example, he just got back from a business trip and envied me because I had a solid routine in my life. Frankly I think this is stupid. Why would someone want to do the same thing at the same time every day?
What I have learned in my life after all this was that it wasn’t really about what you do, it’s about what you don’t do or what doesn’t happen to you or something like that. As a kid I couldn’t quit grasp the thought of something happening because I didn’t do something. I seemed to think it all happened because of what did happen. Mistakes, mistakes, mistakes.
I grew up in Portland Oregon and I lived there for most of the time. Every other weekend I would go up to my grandma’s house in a small lonely town called Goldendale. When I went up to her house it was very different from being at my mother’s house down in Portland. I got to do whatever I want whenever I please and, most importantly I had free 24-hour access to the fridge.
At that time I was up there for 4 days to visit before I went away to a Basketball camp at the very Catholic, George Fox University. The only thing going on in my life, that wasn’t pleasant, was that I was expecting a final report card before summer and I did not know the contents of it and in gave me an unsettling feeling at night.
I would lay in my bed thinking “it could have come today,’ and I mixed thoughts about that.
For one thing it could come and be horrible and my mother could hate me for the entire summer. On the other hand it could come and I could be welcomed back to Portland by happy parents and signs that said, “You are smart.”
It all hit me at about 9:00 when grandma and me were sitting on the couch, watching television. We were watching a really sketchy show about a girl who can see ghosts. I don’t know where it came from but I got the sudden urge to be free and to get away from my life. Again, it was probably the sense of doom that my report card might have just arrived at my house. Maybe not. Either way I was all of a sudden determined to get out of this house, to get out of all houses, to get out of the city or town, to get away from my life.
When the idea hit me I startled back for a minute and asked grandma if she would excuse me. Kind of sudden, I know but I felt like I had been thinking about it for years and I had just realized the missing piece to it. I did the rational thing and tried to calm myself down by watching some of the basketball game that was on.
My conscience knew it was a really stupid Idea but my smarter sub-conscience told my conscience that it was a good idea. I pondered why I would be having these thoughts. I knew how it would all pan out. I would devastate my entire family and one of them might commit suicide.
Yet, I still couldn’t get myself to think it wasn’t a good idea. Instantly in my mind came a picture I saw in a magazine of a boy who had committed numerous crimes, yet he hadn’t even reached the age of 15. Was I him? Could I be the next… him? No absolutely not. I was loyal to my family. If one of them asked me to jump off a bridge I might do it. (Depending on the height of the bridge and the temperature of the murky waters below.)
I would not do this. I would not kill the rest of my family’s lives just because I felt the urge to be alone, or free. I am but 1 star in the company of Heaven.
Some of you are reading this and thinking, “what a crazy guy, this can’t happen so fast,” but you are wrong. Let me demonstrate. If you are sitting on a park bench in the middle of the day, eating a sandwich and you happen to see the most beautiful girl you have ever seen and she sees you, it is love at first sight. This is not uncommon from what I experienced just 30 minutes ago. It was love at first sight for me, and that horrible idea. But it is forbidden love. I cannot love an idea like that if it hurts my family and people that I care about. Forbidden love, forbidden love.
I lay there on my bed looking down on the newly washed green sheets that my grandma just placed there. My mind came down to one question. Should I go through with it?
My mind came up with a decision that totally surprised me. I told myself that I would sleep on it and what ever I felt like I wanted to do in the morning was my future.
After taking a cold shower I tucked myself into bed and turned off the lamp. I was so surprised at how fast I fell asleep. I fell asleep at my normal rate, which is not normal when I have something on my mind. I am the kind of person who has to think about what just happened, the kind of person who has to analyze every detail of it, but I don’t talk about it because I have learned that people find it annoying.
That is just a bit of it. i will post the whole thing on here when I am done and again don't worry I don't want to run away, I was just running out of topics and this is a pretty interesting one. Okay?
After that I am going to have a nice lunch of Hebrew National Hot-dogs followed by a nice basketball playing at the park. Hopefully they tore out the old rims and put in new ones. Maybe that guy will be there again, today/ Who knows.
After that i plan to sit on my ass for 4 hours and watch the 59th NBA draft, and eat cake... yum.
Anyway, before all that I wanted to talk about today. Today is the day of the 59th NBA draft and I am so excited. Portland has the 22nd pick 9not good at all) and I am hoping that they get that 6'11 Whiteside guy. I checked last night and it turns out that he is the 22nd most talented player in the draft, today. But we will see.
Also today i want to work on the story I am writing about a boy (based on me) who wants to run away. But don't worry I don't want to run away. Here is a sample.
It seemed highly improbable that a kid like me would ever come across the thought of running away, especially when his life was doing better. Maybe it was the sense of impending doom, in that my report card would be arriving in my Portland home soon. Maybe it was the sense that my life had struck the point where it was routine.
You hear some adults talking about how much they would give to have a routine life. My father, for example, he just got back from a business trip and envied me because I had a solid routine in my life. Frankly I think this is stupid. Why would someone want to do the same thing at the same time every day?
What I have learned in my life after all this was that it wasn’t really about what you do, it’s about what you don’t do or what doesn’t happen to you or something like that. As a kid I couldn’t quit grasp the thought of something happening because I didn’t do something. I seemed to think it all happened because of what did happen. Mistakes, mistakes, mistakes.
I grew up in Portland Oregon and I lived there for most of the time. Every other weekend I would go up to my grandma’s house in a small lonely town called Goldendale. When I went up to her house it was very different from being at my mother’s house down in Portland. I got to do whatever I want whenever I please and, most importantly I had free 24-hour access to the fridge.
At that time I was up there for 4 days to visit before I went away to a Basketball camp at the very Catholic, George Fox University. The only thing going on in my life, that wasn’t pleasant, was that I was expecting a final report card before summer and I did not know the contents of it and in gave me an unsettling feeling at night.
I would lay in my bed thinking “it could have come today,’ and I mixed thoughts about that.
For one thing it could come and be horrible and my mother could hate me for the entire summer. On the other hand it could come and I could be welcomed back to Portland by happy parents and signs that said, “You are smart.”
It all hit me at about 9:00 when grandma and me were sitting on the couch, watching television. We were watching a really sketchy show about a girl who can see ghosts. I don’t know where it came from but I got the sudden urge to be free and to get away from my life. Again, it was probably the sense of doom that my report card might have just arrived at my house. Maybe not. Either way I was all of a sudden determined to get out of this house, to get out of all houses, to get out of the city or town, to get away from my life.
When the idea hit me I startled back for a minute and asked grandma if she would excuse me. Kind of sudden, I know but I felt like I had been thinking about it for years and I had just realized the missing piece to it. I did the rational thing and tried to calm myself down by watching some of the basketball game that was on.
My conscience knew it was a really stupid Idea but my smarter sub-conscience told my conscience that it was a good idea. I pondered why I would be having these thoughts. I knew how it would all pan out. I would devastate my entire family and one of them might commit suicide.
Yet, I still couldn’t get myself to think it wasn’t a good idea. Instantly in my mind came a picture I saw in a magazine of a boy who had committed numerous crimes, yet he hadn’t even reached the age of 15. Was I him? Could I be the next… him? No absolutely not. I was loyal to my family. If one of them asked me to jump off a bridge I might do it. (Depending on the height of the bridge and the temperature of the murky waters below.)
I would not do this. I would not kill the rest of my family’s lives just because I felt the urge to be alone, or free. I am but 1 star in the company of Heaven.
Some of you are reading this and thinking, “what a crazy guy, this can’t happen so fast,” but you are wrong. Let me demonstrate. If you are sitting on a park bench in the middle of the day, eating a sandwich and you happen to see the most beautiful girl you have ever seen and she sees you, it is love at first sight. This is not uncommon from what I experienced just 30 minutes ago. It was love at first sight for me, and that horrible idea. But it is forbidden love. I cannot love an idea like that if it hurts my family and people that I care about. Forbidden love, forbidden love.
I lay there on my bed looking down on the newly washed green sheets that my grandma just placed there. My mind came down to one question. Should I go through with it?
My mind came up with a decision that totally surprised me. I told myself that I would sleep on it and what ever I felt like I wanted to do in the morning was my future.
After taking a cold shower I tucked myself into bed and turned off the lamp. I was so surprised at how fast I fell asleep. I fell asleep at my normal rate, which is not normal when I have something on my mind. I am the kind of person who has to think about what just happened, the kind of person who has to analyze every detail of it, but I don’t talk about it because I have learned that people find it annoying.
That is just a bit of it. i will post the whole thing on here when I am done and again don't worry I don't want to run away, I was just running out of topics and this is a pretty interesting one. Okay?
After that I am going to have a nice lunch of Hebrew National Hot-dogs followed by a nice basketball playing at the park. Hopefully they tore out the old rims and put in new ones. Maybe that guy will be there again, today/ Who knows.
After that i plan to sit on my ass for 4 hours and watch the 59th NBA draft, and eat cake... yum.
6.22.2010
A 3 Hour Synopsis of Driving to Grandma's House,
Me and grandma left the house briefly after my brother's babysitter, Robin got there. We exited through the front door and almost immediately ran into Doom-dirt. In it we found a pair of radishes which made me lol until the point where I crapped my pants. Grandma asked if we put the radishes in there and I answered back saying that we would have to be crazy to put plants into dirt that, at some point, would turn into a garden. You don't put plants in dirt when the dirt isn't in a garden yet. Duuh!
She told me that we had to drive up to Oregon City to get some Victorian clothes that her friend was going to give to her. I sat there in the passenger seat reading and repeating directions until I almost memorized how to get there. I also renewed my hate of mapquest. They say that to get from 10th street to Jackson is 0.1 miles but guess what? it was more like 1 mile and just go to the website and try to get from Portland to Paris. See what I'm getting at.
After the horrible attempt to understand Mapquest we arrived at a yellow, cozy home that looked like an old English home that was built in the 20's. I was half right it was made it the 20's but it was supposed to look Victorian. Same thing! When we got inside it felt like we were in the lobby of a hotel, except considerably darker and smaller. In it there was a woman who seemed to be in her mid to late 50's and a closet full of Victorian clothing. When i say this lady had a lot of Victorian clothes it was an understatement.
Like grandma, it seemed, she was an antique collector. In the lobby of her house was an old antique cabinet. In it was a whole lot of books that were the same size color and length. I thought this lady would be crazy to keep the same book but when I took a closer look I saw that they were all readers digest. I had to stop myself from laughing. After that she went into her Victorian closet for I while and I stole an Altoid from an Altoid box on an antique table, no surprise.
When she arrived back from the journey that she had in her closet i noticed that she was wearing Sketcher's Shapeups! I had to keep myself from laughing again. Before we went she insisted that we went on a tour of her house. It looked like a Victorian Castle. oh my God. This woman didn't even have any clothes aside from her collection of Victorian clothes. Her house is Victorian. You know she seems like the kind of woman who would paint wallpaper oh wait she did that too she painted wallpaper gold and the wallpaper was on her ceiling! WALLpaper, people not ceiling paper!
Victorian wasn't the only theme in her house. I noticed that the toilet and the sinks were separated so that means she must have a New Zealand background as well. She even told us towards the end the the tour that her husband was born in New Zealand.
After we were done touring the interior of the house we went outside to the exterior and let me tell you it had Victorian written all over it. There were plants all over it and there were stone steps and everything. Now I know what a Victorian castle looks like. After a while we went back inside to pack up all the clothes. During that time we got to talking about how good god is. She told us that she went through some kind of illness and she kept saying that God saved her. That is plausible but maybe just maybe, i'm just saying, the doctor saved her.
I was so relieved when we finally left her house but right when we got in the car grandma whipped out the Mary Higgins Clark book and this time it was un-abridged. During the drive we stopped by Burgerking to get something and I was still hungry so while we were in the Dalles we did it again. They were doing this Eclipse contest, but I didn't win tickets to the movie for opening night. Sigh. The drive back was 3 hours.
She told me that we had to drive up to Oregon City to get some Victorian clothes that her friend was going to give to her. I sat there in the passenger seat reading and repeating directions until I almost memorized how to get there. I also renewed my hate of mapquest. They say that to get from 10th street to Jackson is 0.1 miles but guess what? it was more like 1 mile and just go to the website and try to get from Portland to Paris. See what I'm getting at.
After the horrible attempt to understand Mapquest we arrived at a yellow, cozy home that looked like an old English home that was built in the 20's. I was half right it was made it the 20's but it was supposed to look Victorian. Same thing! When we got inside it felt like we were in the lobby of a hotel, except considerably darker and smaller. In it there was a woman who seemed to be in her mid to late 50's and a closet full of Victorian clothing. When i say this lady had a lot of Victorian clothes it was an understatement.
Like grandma, it seemed, she was an antique collector. In the lobby of her house was an old antique cabinet. In it was a whole lot of books that were the same size color and length. I thought this lady would be crazy to keep the same book but when I took a closer look I saw that they were all readers digest. I had to stop myself from laughing. After that she went into her Victorian closet for I while and I stole an Altoid from an Altoid box on an antique table, no surprise.
When she arrived back from the journey that she had in her closet i noticed that she was wearing Sketcher's Shapeups! I had to keep myself from laughing again. Before we went she insisted that we went on a tour of her house. It looked like a Victorian Castle. oh my God. This woman didn't even have any clothes aside from her collection of Victorian clothes. Her house is Victorian. You know she seems like the kind of woman who would paint wallpaper oh wait she did that too she painted wallpaper gold and the wallpaper was on her ceiling! WALLpaper, people not ceiling paper!
Victorian wasn't the only theme in her house. I noticed that the toilet and the sinks were separated so that means she must have a New Zealand background as well. She even told us towards the end the the tour that her husband was born in New Zealand.
After we were done touring the interior of the house we went outside to the exterior and let me tell you it had Victorian written all over it. There were plants all over it and there were stone steps and everything. Now I know what a Victorian castle looks like. After a while we went back inside to pack up all the clothes. During that time we got to talking about how good god is. She told us that she went through some kind of illness and she kept saying that God saved her. That is plausible but maybe just maybe, i'm just saying, the doctor saved her.
I was so relieved when we finally left her house but right when we got in the car grandma whipped out the Mary Higgins Clark book and this time it was un-abridged. During the drive we stopped by Burgerking to get something and I was still hungry so while we were in the Dalles we did it again. They were doing this Eclipse contest, but I didn't win tickets to the movie for opening night. Sigh. The drive back was 3 hours.
6.11.2010
The 2nd to Last Day of School,
Before I start to rant and rave about how stupid the school is for making the last day of school next week, in the middle of the week, Just want to take a minute to say that 8th graders are really loud and that I hate August... hi August, I hope your having fun with your best Skinny Jeans award and satisfied with making my back hurt so much by plunging your shoe into it... all will be explained in good time, Reader.
Anyway, back to the point, some people imagine the last day of school as people walking out of school, smiling with there arms up handing out there pen and a yearbook for people to sign. Reality check people. Even though today wasn't technically the last day of school it was the PPS equivalent of the last day of school and here is what happened. As soon as the bell rang everybody ran out of the classrooms and started to yell at the top of there lungs. Holy crap where did my ear go. Oh wait I ripped it off as soon as David came over to me and said, "man this is great," and it was funny because it was actually the first time I couldn't hear David, but Dvid+other noises=Eli ripping off his ear. At this point I would like to note that, that makes me 1 more step closer to being a genius... like Van Gogh. Lol.
Let me fill you in on how all of this happened. In Japanese and Social Study's we were finishing up watching peoples videos and so that was just like anything else. Once we got to math we went immediately to Mr. Grooms room for a light bulb drop. This was rad because the day before we made contraptions that were supposed to make our light bulb be delivered safely from a 4 meter lift to the ground...our thing was so cool and we were so sure that ours was going to work but that, to will all be explained in good time.
When we got to his room it was all weird because the desks were gone and replacing them was 4 rows of chairs. It was like a giant ocean of chairs. I tried to get the best seat that I could but I ended up having to sit in the 2nd row. Mr. Groom was going to drop them in order of the classes that he see's so first 3rd period and than 7th and 8th. We were told that the peoples bulbs that were going to be dropped had to sit in the first to rows, so I had to give up my totally awesome seat to go sit in the back, where I couldn't see and darn thing.
The whole audience "woahed," when ever they heard the shattering of the bulb, except of course the group who dropped it. For them it was an emotional upset and afterwards they all looked like they needed counseling. I always went up to them and told them that it wasn't a big deal, but they always told me to shut up.
The time finally came for us to drop ours. We were so sure that it was going to work because we had a genius plan that the scissors would absorb all the shock, but obviously the bulb had experienced more shock because 3 or 4 seconds after it was drop we heard a dramatic shatter and than the popping of balloons... to bad. The rest of that was basically history and so we had advisory and than lunch and than we went to the cafeteria for the community celebration.
I arrived to the sound of justin Biebers hit, Baby, playing on the stereo and that was also the cause as to why I tore off my ear. I got a glass of water and began to sign yearbooks. The thing I said on the yearbooks was "because i'll be famous -Eli," and than everybody would be all like "pff, yeah right," oh those people will see. We were all rocking out to a B.O.B song when we were bombarded by a bunch of non-jmp d-bags.
We all looked up at Mr. Bacon and he said "oh crap," on the mic and than said "i am so sorry, I thought that I signed my name on the sheet," and than the teacher leading the other group looked at him like he was crazy. He told us to all meet up in Mr. Grooms class and so we all walked back to Groom's room and sat down. He told us that we all needed to move the tables out and put shairs out because we were about to have 130 people in 1 room and that is never good.
I chose a chair way in the back with all my friends and we started this puppy off.
We started off by announcing the winners of the citizenship award and of course my name was not called so i didn't get a poorly hand drwn picture of a guy holding a trophy with my name on it. Toooo baaaaaad. After that they started doing this thing called the "wacky" awards. They started to give out awards to people. Just to show you how stupid these were here is a sample. Best Swimmer. Best Handwriting. Most Crazy. Best Skinny Jeans. And August went crazy when he won that. He started jumping up and down and he was so pumped that he decided to come sit behind me.
He asked me if it was okay if he put his foot on my chair and when he did he completely jabbed it into my back. It was like this through the rest of the wacky awards and some of the slideshow until I moved. Some of you are asking why i didn't just ask him to move his foot? Because I can't just ask that to an 8th grader, it will make me seem bad and not help me be considered "cool" amoung there pack who they like to call, "the fresh boyz,"
.
After all that we put the tables back and unloaded our locker and than I began the trip to grandma;s house. Dun Dun Dun.... It began with Kayla waving at my grandma and my grandma waved back, a little creeped out. I couldn't blame her. When I got in the car she asked me if Kayla was mental. I said yes. F.Y.I she really isn't and if Kayla is reading this... um... anyway.
After about 20 minutes of driving and talking she hadn't pulled out the Mary Higgins Clark Audiobook out yet and it was a little weird. She than told me that it was in a hard to reach bag under all her suit cases and she told me it would be really hard to get. Remind me to never trust grandma again because it was so easy to get, that I bet Jasper could have gotten it.
Well we are all out of time... bye.
Anyway, back to the point, some people imagine the last day of school as people walking out of school, smiling with there arms up handing out there pen and a yearbook for people to sign. Reality check people. Even though today wasn't technically the last day of school it was the PPS equivalent of the last day of school and here is what happened. As soon as the bell rang everybody ran out of the classrooms and started to yell at the top of there lungs. Holy crap where did my ear go. Oh wait I ripped it off as soon as David came over to me and said, "man this is great," and it was funny because it was actually the first time I couldn't hear David, but Dvid+other noises=Eli ripping off his ear. At this point I would like to note that, that makes me 1 more step closer to being a genius... like Van Gogh. Lol.
Let me fill you in on how all of this happened. In Japanese and Social Study's we were finishing up watching peoples videos and so that was just like anything else. Once we got to math we went immediately to Mr. Grooms room for a light bulb drop. This was rad because the day before we made contraptions that were supposed to make our light bulb be delivered safely from a 4 meter lift to the ground...our thing was so cool and we were so sure that ours was going to work but that, to will all be explained in good time.
When we got to his room it was all weird because the desks were gone and replacing them was 4 rows of chairs. It was like a giant ocean of chairs. I tried to get the best seat that I could but I ended up having to sit in the 2nd row. Mr. Groom was going to drop them in order of the classes that he see's so first 3rd period and than 7th and 8th. We were told that the peoples bulbs that were going to be dropped had to sit in the first to rows, so I had to give up my totally awesome seat to go sit in the back, where I couldn't see and darn thing.
The whole audience "woahed," when ever they heard the shattering of the bulb, except of course the group who dropped it. For them it was an emotional upset and afterwards they all looked like they needed counseling. I always went up to them and told them that it wasn't a big deal, but they always told me to shut up.
The time finally came for us to drop ours. We were so sure that it was going to work because we had a genius plan that the scissors would absorb all the shock, but obviously the bulb had experienced more shock because 3 or 4 seconds after it was drop we heard a dramatic shatter and than the popping of balloons... to bad. The rest of that was basically history and so we had advisory and than lunch and than we went to the cafeteria for the community celebration.
I arrived to the sound of justin Biebers hit, Baby, playing on the stereo and that was also the cause as to why I tore off my ear. I got a glass of water and began to sign yearbooks. The thing I said on the yearbooks was "because i'll be famous -Eli," and than everybody would be all like "pff, yeah right," oh those people will see. We were all rocking out to a B.O.B song when we were bombarded by a bunch of non-jmp d-bags.
We all looked up at Mr. Bacon and he said "oh crap," on the mic and than said "i am so sorry, I thought that I signed my name on the sheet," and than the teacher leading the other group looked at him like he was crazy. He told us to all meet up in Mr. Grooms class and so we all walked back to Groom's room and sat down. He told us that we all needed to move the tables out and put shairs out because we were about to have 130 people in 1 room and that is never good.
I chose a chair way in the back with all my friends and we started this puppy off.
We started off by announcing the winners of the citizenship award and of course my name was not called so i didn't get a poorly hand drwn picture of a guy holding a trophy with my name on it. Toooo baaaaaad. After that they started doing this thing called the "wacky" awards. They started to give out awards to people. Just to show you how stupid these were here is a sample. Best Swimmer. Best Handwriting. Most Crazy. Best Skinny Jeans. And August went crazy when he won that. He started jumping up and down and he was so pumped that he decided to come sit behind me.
He asked me if it was okay if he put his foot on my chair and when he did he completely jabbed it into my back. It was like this through the rest of the wacky awards and some of the slideshow until I moved. Some of you are asking why i didn't just ask him to move his foot? Because I can't just ask that to an 8th grader, it will make me seem bad and not help me be considered "cool" amoung there pack who they like to call, "the fresh boyz,"
.
After all that we put the tables back and unloaded our locker and than I began the trip to grandma;s house. Dun Dun Dun.... It began with Kayla waving at my grandma and my grandma waved back, a little creeped out. I couldn't blame her. When I got in the car she asked me if Kayla was mental. I said yes. F.Y.I she really isn't and if Kayla is reading this... um... anyway.
After about 20 minutes of driving and talking she hadn't pulled out the Mary Higgins Clark Audiobook out yet and it was a little weird. She than told me that it was in a hard to reach bag under all her suit cases and she told me it would be really hard to get. Remind me to never trust grandma again because it was so easy to get, that I bet Jasper could have gotten it.
Well we are all out of time... bye.
3.24.2010
The last week, or so,
I have spent the last few days at my grandma's house, in Washington. It all started on Friday, the last day of school for a while because of Spring Break. I thought that Grandma was going to pick me up, so I scanned the block to see if I could find a light green Prius. I looked and I looked, but I just couldn't find it. Instead on the north side of the school I found Thomas's car. I climbed in and no surprise to me... he was texting.
"Just one second, I am replying to something on Facebook," he said. I didn't say anything, because I know if I did say something it would probably be something I would regret in the near future.
When he was done, he set down his phone and asked me how my day was.
"Oh, you know. The same. Well actually Mr. Groom was here today and Mr. Bacon told us about our E.P's," i said.
"What's and E.P," he asked me, while starting the car.
"Expert Project, we have to learn a lot of stuff about something and share it with the class," I mumbled. He nodded and started to focus on driving. There was an unusual amount of red lights on the way home. I thought maybe God wanted me and THomas to socialize. I didn't really want to talk, I had a long day at school and I wanted to keep it cool for the next week.
I guessed that he had picked me up because he had gone to the tubs to soak and left the baby with grandma. He does that a lot now. I want to go to the tubs. When we got home I found grandma with my cute little baby brother.
I picked him up and said "I love you, little one," and gave him to Thomas.
Me and the Grandmister left shortly after that. The ride to Goldendale was pretty short, considering that we listened to an audiobook all the way home.
When we got to my home away from home away from home (that is not a typo,) I layed on my bed and watched NBATV until it was 10 and I went to bed. In bed i thought about basketball.
SATURDAY:
I woke up at around 8:30 because grandma had a thing were she wanted everyone to be up when she was. I got up and she fixed me a bowl of Apple Jacks and i sat down with my t.v tray and watched NBATV for a while.
Sadly there weren't any Blazer games on the night before so I couldn't really say that the show was "interesting." That was about all I did until noon when me and grandpa went over to the Basketball court to play some good ol' b-ball. I beat him 21 to 18. He wanted to quit after that.
So we went over to Subway and I had my regular thing. Turkey, mustard, L&T, salt, pickles and onions... yum.
When we got home I watched NBATV for the rest of the afternoon and than we had some dinner, though I don't remember what it was.
Then we all went to bed, thinking about basketball.
SUNDAY:
On Sunday I woke up, drowsily to grandma's voice, again. I stayed in bed for 30 more seconds, than slowly got up and walked into thee kitchen.
"Good morning," she said to me while preparing my cereal.
"Good morning to you," i said quietly, still fighting falling asleep while standing. We small talked for the rest of the 2 minutes and 48.6 seconds i was in the kitchen and then I went into my room and watched the games from the night before and all the highlights and that stuff.
I gobbled down my cereal and took a quick shower. Afterwards I watched more NBATV and got dressed.
We went to church at 10:30 so we could be there and talk with all the other people. Paster Greg's sermon was... interesting. We left the building very slowly, so we could socialize with everyone else.
"Oh Hannah you are growing up to be such a doll."
"Don't forget our piano lessons."
"Isn't God great."
"You are so handsome."
"Oh my land what a cute dress."
"How is your sister doing?"
"Um... he is actually my brother."
"Oh (chuckle chuckle) my mistake. How is he?
"Eli, why aren't you flying those h-e-l-i-c-o-p-t-e-r-s?"
"We can't fly them with all the chairs in here, Dwayne."
"Hahahahahahahahaha."
That is just a sample of what it is like walking out of Grace Brethren Church.
I had lunch when we got home and at 2:30 Grandma took me to play some basketball at the park. There was no one there so it was kind of boring shooting with no one but myself.
When all that stuff was over grandma took me home and I watched NBATV until about 6 when grandpa took me and grandma outside to help him put up sheetrock. Most of the time I was in the corner of the shed reading an old burnt up records book but occasionally I helped.
After this was all done I watched some more NBATV and then I went to bed.
MONDAY:
I woke up, but surprisingly not to grandma's call. I laid in bed for 5 more minutes so i could rest my feet and relax. I don't know why but after 11 hours of sleep I felt that I needed rest. Funny, right?
I got out of bed and went pee so I could go drink Hot Chocolate while the tank was empty. I said hello to grandma and got my yellow ball that my mom would not let me use at her house and started playing with it using the miniature hoop.
After this was over I ate my breakfast while watching NBATV, naturally. Grandma had to go teach Piano lessons at her church so I was alone in the house for a while. During this time I watched NBATV and played with the miniature hoop.
When she got home she fixed me some Hebrew National Hotdogs, even though they were the wrong kind. The day before we had a big argument about what kind of Hotdogs are pork and which are beef.
I ended this conversation by saying that it probably wasn't either one... it was another one. AHHHH! Oh, sorry about that.
The rest of the day was kind of normal. NBATV, blazer game, dinner all that jazz.
TUESDAY:
Tuesday was a really cool day. I woke up and grandma made me breakfast and yeah. Then me and her and my aunt Jessica left to go to The Dalles to go shopping and see the new Alice in Wonderland story.
The movie was great, though Johnny Depp was in it way more than he needed to be. We got a bottle warmer for my brother and that was about it.
When we got back home nothing much really happened. Except I had a great dinner of soup and crackers.
WEDNESDAY:
On Wednesday I couldn't focus because all I could think about was going to the park and playing Basketball. We left to go to the park at one, but we found a lot of kids there. So we went and did some errands first and then we came back but there were still a bunch of kids there.
So i decided to go and play with them, no matter what. At first it didn't work so well. It went something like this.
(Snicker.) "He is white."
"Hahahahahahahahah."
"Oh he can dribble it through his legs. He is like Michael Jordan," followed by an attempt to dribble through his legs followed by the ball ending up in the middle of the street. Now who's Michael Jordan, dumbbutt.
Than I found some people to play a game with and I came out with 10 points. By the end I was exhausted so when I got the ball I passed it to someone.
By the time this was all over I came home and went to bed, thinking about Basketball.
(I am going to skip Thursday because nothing happened.)
FRIDAY:
On friday we woke up at 7 so we could go see GG and Gramps.
On thee way down we listened to this Mary Higgins Clark audio book about, well nevermind.
Ok just to put this in perspective we drove 3 and a half hours to go to Burgerking. But I guess we say GG and Gramps.
When we got to Portland we picked up Jasper. He was so cute!!!
GG and gramps got to hold him.
And then we went home, and that was it.
THE END.
"Just one second, I am replying to something on Facebook," he said. I didn't say anything, because I know if I did say something it would probably be something I would regret in the near future.
When he was done, he set down his phone and asked me how my day was.
"Oh, you know. The same. Well actually Mr. Groom was here today and Mr. Bacon told us about our E.P's," i said.
"What's and E.P," he asked me, while starting the car.
"Expert Project, we have to learn a lot of stuff about something and share it with the class," I mumbled. He nodded and started to focus on driving. There was an unusual amount of red lights on the way home. I thought maybe God wanted me and THomas to socialize. I didn't really want to talk, I had a long day at school and I wanted to keep it cool for the next week.
I guessed that he had picked me up because he had gone to the tubs to soak and left the baby with grandma. He does that a lot now. I want to go to the tubs. When we got home I found grandma with my cute little baby brother.
I picked him up and said "I love you, little one," and gave him to Thomas.
Me and the Grandmister left shortly after that. The ride to Goldendale was pretty short, considering that we listened to an audiobook all the way home.
When we got to my home away from home away from home (that is not a typo,) I layed on my bed and watched NBATV until it was 10 and I went to bed. In bed i thought about basketball.
SATURDAY:
I woke up at around 8:30 because grandma had a thing were she wanted everyone to be up when she was. I got up and she fixed me a bowl of Apple Jacks and i sat down with my t.v tray and watched NBATV for a while.
Sadly there weren't any Blazer games on the night before so I couldn't really say that the show was "interesting." That was about all I did until noon when me and grandpa went over to the Basketball court to play some good ol' b-ball. I beat him 21 to 18. He wanted to quit after that.
So we went over to Subway and I had my regular thing. Turkey, mustard, L&T, salt, pickles and onions... yum.
When we got home I watched NBATV for the rest of the afternoon and than we had some dinner, though I don't remember what it was.
Then we all went to bed, thinking about basketball.
SUNDAY:
On Sunday I woke up, drowsily to grandma's voice, again. I stayed in bed for 30 more seconds, than slowly got up and walked into thee kitchen.
"Good morning," she said to me while preparing my cereal.
"Good morning to you," i said quietly, still fighting falling asleep while standing. We small talked for the rest of the 2 minutes and 48.6 seconds i was in the kitchen and then I went into my room and watched the games from the night before and all the highlights and that stuff.
I gobbled down my cereal and took a quick shower. Afterwards I watched more NBATV and got dressed.
We went to church at 10:30 so we could be there and talk with all the other people. Paster Greg's sermon was... interesting. We left the building very slowly, so we could socialize with everyone else.
"Oh Hannah you are growing up to be such a doll."
"Don't forget our piano lessons."
"Isn't God great."
"You are so handsome."
"Oh my land what a cute dress."
"How is your sister doing?"
"Um... he is actually my brother."
"Oh (chuckle chuckle) my mistake. How is he?
"Eli, why aren't you flying those h-e-l-i-c-o-p-t-e-r-s?"
"We can't fly them with all the chairs in here, Dwayne."
"Hahahahahahahahaha."
That is just a sample of what it is like walking out of Grace Brethren Church.
I had lunch when we got home and at 2:30 Grandma took me to play some basketball at the park. There was no one there so it was kind of boring shooting with no one but myself.
When all that stuff was over grandma took me home and I watched NBATV until about 6 when grandpa took me and grandma outside to help him put up sheetrock. Most of the time I was in the corner of the shed reading an old burnt up records book but occasionally I helped.
After this was all done I watched some more NBATV and then I went to bed.
MONDAY:
I woke up, but surprisingly not to grandma's call. I laid in bed for 5 more minutes so i could rest my feet and relax. I don't know why but after 11 hours of sleep I felt that I needed rest. Funny, right?
I got out of bed and went pee so I could go drink Hot Chocolate while the tank was empty. I said hello to grandma and got my yellow ball that my mom would not let me use at her house and started playing with it using the miniature hoop.
After this was over I ate my breakfast while watching NBATV, naturally. Grandma had to go teach Piano lessons at her church so I was alone in the house for a while. During this time I watched NBATV and played with the miniature hoop.
When she got home she fixed me some Hebrew National Hotdogs, even though they were the wrong kind. The day before we had a big argument about what kind of Hotdogs are pork and which are beef.
I ended this conversation by saying that it probably wasn't either one... it was another one. AHHHH! Oh, sorry about that.
The rest of the day was kind of normal. NBATV, blazer game, dinner all that jazz.
TUESDAY:
Tuesday was a really cool day. I woke up and grandma made me breakfast and yeah. Then me and her and my aunt Jessica left to go to The Dalles to go shopping and see the new Alice in Wonderland story.
The movie was great, though Johnny Depp was in it way more than he needed to be. We got a bottle warmer for my brother and that was about it.
When we got back home nothing much really happened. Except I had a great dinner of soup and crackers.
WEDNESDAY:
On Wednesday I couldn't focus because all I could think about was going to the park and playing Basketball. We left to go to the park at one, but we found a lot of kids there. So we went and did some errands first and then we came back but there were still a bunch of kids there.
So i decided to go and play with them, no matter what. At first it didn't work so well. It went something like this.
(Snicker.) "He is white."
"Hahahahahahahahah."
"Oh he can dribble it through his legs. He is like Michael Jordan," followed by an attempt to dribble through his legs followed by the ball ending up in the middle of the street. Now who's Michael Jordan, dumbbutt.
Than I found some people to play a game with and I came out with 10 points. By the end I was exhausted so when I got the ball I passed it to someone.
By the time this was all over I came home and went to bed, thinking about Basketball.
(I am going to skip Thursday because nothing happened.)
FRIDAY:
On friday we woke up at 7 so we could go see GG and Gramps.
On thee way down we listened to this Mary Higgins Clark audio book about, well nevermind.
Ok just to put this in perspective we drove 3 and a half hours to go to Burgerking. But I guess we say GG and Gramps.
When we got to Portland we picked up Jasper. He was so cute!!!
GG and gramps got to hold him.
And then we went home, and that was it.
THE END.
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